That was Yesterday

 

Living in the past and viewing the past is two totally different belief systems and behaviors. A scenario from a co-worker can best explain the distinction. The names have been altered.

Moon: I think I made a mistake.

River: What do you mean? What happened?

Moon: Well, I was going over my messages that I’ve sent over to the head office and I think that I put the wrong message on another’s client’s chart.

(Moon’s normal small eyes are huge like her name.)

River: Ok Moon, let me look at the case and see. I’ll come over to your desk.

(River gears up for the worst to access the damage. Outwardly she’s cool, inside she’s trying to find the road, she needs to navigate the situation and Moon. Moon retells the story and shows River on the computer what possibly could have passed for the mix-up. As River listens, she has visibly seen the process of why this happened. Moon completes her explanation. She looks to River to repair the situation. She looks for hope.)

River: Ok Moon. First of all, you just got here and you’re not going to know everything about this position. Second, it’s not that bad. Let me make a phone call and speak with my go-to person there so we can rectify this. In the meantime, I will add an addendum to the note you’ve sent.

(Moon’s face softens, and her shoulders relax – a bit. River madly writes the new note as Moon watches. River notices Moon’s mouth is made into an ‘o’. She’s breathing through her mouth.)

(River calls her contact. They discuss the messages and several options how this can be handled. They determine, as Moon intently watches River’s face and listens to half the telephone conversation. River hangs up.)

River: Ok Moon, this is how we decided to manage the messages.

Moon: Am I in trouble? Oh, my… I just got here…

River: Calm down Moon. You’re not in any trouble. You just got here, and we don’t expect for you to know everything. Errors will be cleared, but the good thing about this is, you will think of this moment and know what to do if this situation comes up again. Also, the client will be fine. It was merely a matter, ensuring the client’s actual message was fixed. So, it’s alright, really. Everything has been worked out for you.

Moon: Oh, thank you River. I really appreciate all your help.

River: You’re welcome, but let me ask you a question. What made you look back at your message?

Moon: I check them because I want to see if I made any mistakes and when I saw that I knew was not the message I had written for the correct person.

River: Well, it was a good thing that you went over the message. But all is well now so just be mindful of the names on the account. Just take your time, okay?

Moon: I will. But I could have sworn I wrote that message on the other account.

River: Well, it’s fine now.

(For River the situation is over, and she goes back to her work.)

Silence.

A couple of minutes later River looks up and sees Moon staring at the computer screen and holding her arm.

River: Moon, are you ok?

Moon: She turns around, “Yes, I am fine. We did all that we could, and I will watch the accounts to make sure I notate the correct one.”

River: You’re sure you’re all right?

Moon: Yes, that was yesterday. I’m good. I did all that I knew to do. I can do no more

When Moon made that statement about “that was yesterday” it touched me deeply. Here was a scenario that could have run amiss. The confusion could have potentially been distressing for the client. Moon listened to her intuition to check on her work, and she obeyed. She asked for help, nervously trusted the situation to someone whom she felt would make the best possible assessment and waited. She waited for an unknown outcome, hoping it would be favorable. I could see the questions forming in her mind from possible past similar experiences. Being a new employee would this be a blight on her new journey? Me telling her what the other voice she couldn’t hear on the phone say the solution worked in her favor. I saw her finally breathe a full breath and let it go. Moon allowed herself to feel and experience her emotions. She allowed them to pass through her and not keep them bottled up inside of her soul to create wounds. Her silence came not to keep rehashing the situation in her mind, but to allow peace, contentment and gratefulness to occupy the place where fear once resided. Her simple reply, “that was yesterday” is a person who was now viewing her past and living in the moment.

Gleaning from this hour scenario I sat at my desk and thought about past situations that I was still living in. I decided that when I got to my safe place, I’d write each one down. I did. I also decided that no matter where I’m at in the process I would say to each one, “that was yesterday.”

What are you going to say to the unpleasant childhood memories? Are you going to continue to live in the past or view them from the present with no toxic emotional attachment? Are you going to forgive all parties involved and that does include yourself? Are you going to finally accept you did what you thought was best at the moment, and the belief or behavior you used to protect you no longer serves you? Or are you going to allow yourself to finally say, “that was yesterday?”

Namaste’

Unleash

Unleash

Unleash

 

According to Dictionary.com unleash means, “to release from or as if from a leash; set loose to pursue or run at will; to abandon control of.”

As of late I’m noticing it more in realms of healing, health, energy, movement, growth, spirituality, and technology.  These headings are interchangeable and can be subheadings under each subject.  But unleash is the common denominator that each share and is applied to a motion.

blackwomandesk

Recently I was hired for a new assignment with a major corporation. Admittedly I was excited after a twelve-year lesson that tore down a shoddy foundation. And yes, I am still being built, “over, again, another.” Daily I’m unleashing energies that I inherited from wounded souls and some I accepted as my own. And those traits I don’t necessarily care for that will possibly remain I am learning to walk with. Hate it. But the entity Peace is the goal for my soul. That is the energy I choose to abide in and with.

I know you’re probably wondering what does this have to do with my new assignment. Well, I’m in an environment that literally has systems in place that care about their employees, emotional, physical, social, relational, and educational well-being. I’ve walked into what I knew from being in the opposite, a place of what a business culture should be built upon.

Have you ever waited for the other foot to drop? That’s how I feel sometimes but each time I walk through the door I’m greeted with a hearty ‘Good Morning’ and a smile from ninety-nine percent of the employees including upper management. Wow! I sat in Orientation thinking asinine questions like:

1. Do I deserve this?

2. Can I really perform in this position?

3. Can I handle all this information?

4. Is this the place I’m supposed to be?

5. Can I bring value to this position?

6. Will I be promotable in six months?

I mean I’m sitting there and all of these questions and more are running through my head. I’ve had to tell myself daily that they wouldn’t have hired me if they thought I couldn’t do the job. So come on girl, let’s do the job. You would think the last twelve years I had time to release negative beliefs.  But it seems a portion of them have been hiding and waiting for this golden moment to rear their ugly heads. AGH!

blackwomandesert

Then again, maybe it was divinely appointed for them to rear their heads. I needed to see them, identify, thank and release them, and tell them their services are no longer needed. The last twelve years of being in the wilderness came with a mindset of social and relational skills to survive in isolation.  Connecting with people again, and not just in a corporate environment is overwhelming at times. I’m taking it slow and making sure that I breathe. That’s very important. Breathe. Unleash. Breathe. Unleash.

“I’m worthy. Breathe. Unleash.

I deserve to be here. Breathe. Unleash.

Go your speed. Breathe. Unleash.

This place is not your past. Breathe. Unleash.

You’re in a new place. Breathe. Unleash.

Smile. Breathe. Unleash.

Good Morning. Breathe. Unleash.

blackwomanproud

 

 

 

 

 

 

At times, we have to travel in our illustrious past to see the courageous women who paved the way for us to be in settings we only dreamed of. My sister friend and blogger Couture Purpose does an eloquent job of paying homage to women who sometimes go unsung but their deeds live on. Check out her blog where “Couture Purpose is ‘designed to make statements.’

Now that we are springing forward know that you are moving in new places, spaces, and atmospheres! It’s because you’ve paid the cost and deserve to be there. Now go further!

Please sit back and enjoy my theme song for 2016 by Rachel Platten, “The Fight Song.”

Until next time “sweet sleep, and angels keep!”

Uncreate the Verbal Contracts

Uncreate the Verbal Contracts

 

Uncreate the Contracts

 

It’s time to delete the tape! It’s time to evict the people living inside your head, beliefs, emotions, and voice! It’s time to delete the memories in your cells! It’s time to tell those negative words, unseemly behaviors, and low-frequency thoughts to go! It’s time to uncreate the verbal contracts and break through your authentic self and life!

You were consistently verbally abused as a child and agreed to believe those words. I know you were a child and didn’t have the wherewithal to fight the words. You internalized this to mean, “You weren’t good enough.” But now you are at a crossroad in your adult life and choices must be made to uncreate the verbal contracts or stay aligned in agreement with the enemy of your soul. Are you ready?

Every word and statement, write down the person(s) name who said it. In another column write an I AM statement about you. For example, I AM INTELLIGENT, OR I AM CREATIVE. This may take a while so take breaks. You can do this in stages. It can be emotionally intense. Take your time. Write a few words and people for an hour a day and speak aloud the below declaration. Say aloud your new I AM affirmations daily too. Move in that vacant space your new beliefs hearing your own voice.

When you have completed as many as you can say aloud the following declaration with the Restorer of your soul!

 I renounce and denounce every word spoken to me that I’ve believed from a child. I am not these words and statements. I am a child of I AM! And I am fearfully and wonderfully made! I am a divine being created in the image of I AM. I choose to speak I AM forth by rewriting my mental, emotional, and physical script with my voice and behavior.

For those who attacked me with their religion and co-signing God’s name to their abuse, I renounce their god of bondage and fear and choose to learn God for myself. I renounce and denounce the language of a slave and I speak the language of freedom! I am worthy. Period.

On this day ______________ I uncreate every verbal contract that I agreed to and by the great I AM I ask that it be destroyed and sent back to the sender. Amen

You will repeat this declaration as needed. You’ve existed in another persons reality for a long time and they don’t want to leave so easily. Those memories are in your cells and must be removed.

The next few techniques are excellent ways of clearing your cells. Take walks, being in nature clears your mind. Another practice is to take your hands and pat them, on the top of your thighs like you’re walking.  One last exercise is to fold your arms and take your hands and pat your arms like you are walking. It seems strange but that motion blocks negative mind chatter.

You are Removing, what no longer serves you and Restoring’ your authentic emotions, thoughts, and voice! This is a journey so take steps and read my friend Neil Vermillion’s blog. He has insight that will assist, affirm and order your steps daily.

In my next blog January 30, 2016, I will discuss “Forgiveness.” I may have a special guest blogger to walk you in forgiveness. This is her field of expertise. Meanwhile, enjoy Ms. Janet Jackson’s “Control.” We know WHO is really in control of our lives but “Self-Control” is a ‘Fruit of the Spirit’.  Until thenknow that you are not alone, sweet sleep, and angels keep. 

When you look in the mirror do you know the person looking back-

To purchase my memoir just click the picture above! THANK YOU. And one last thing, would love to read your comments if my blogs are helping you and if it is “DON’T FORGET TO SUBSCRIBE & SHARE!” 

Break Through in 2016!

Breakthrough Series 2016

Breakthrough Series 2016

 

Breakthrough Series 2016
Breakthrough Series 2016

Hey, Phamily!

I hope all is well with you and those you love! We’ve now experienced the first week of the new year. Was it a good week? I hope it was. Mine has been a culmination of emotions, situations, cleansings, and expansions but, all in all, they have been needed. Change, Removal, Restoral, Transformations, Elevations are all a part of breakthroughs. Be ye physical, emotional, mental, or in your soul, they all come with their own unique manifestations and mechanisms for us to be more authentic in mind, body and soul.

Well, on to what I’ve been revealing on my new Facebook page, “Author Lana M Hooks.” Every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday I post vignette’s of “Breakthroughs” that I want to happen in the near future. So I write them down as if they’ve already occurred. It’s my way of acknowledging my growth, my expansion into new areas of my life, my emotions healed and living my dreams. We need to know that we won’t be the same person tomorrow if we do the work needed now to change. I honestly believe if we remember, recognize, remove, and restore our authentic emotions, thoughts, and voice we will live our lives authentically and our dreams will manifest themselves.

I know some people may not be Facebook users or just taking a break and I didn’t want you to miss out on the vignette’s I posted this week. I am posting them all today in my blog and would love to hear back from you some of your “Breakthroughs” that you’d like to have happened in your life. This does not replace my bi-weekly blog this is in addition to it that I will post beginning next week on the same days I post on Facebook. I just don’t want you to miss out on you being a part of the #Breakthroughseries2016! I have friends who’ll be assisting you in your breakthroughs! Read my friend Neil Vermillion’s blog. He gives divine insight to propel you along further on your journey!

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blessed

 

Please join me in sharing your “breakthrough” vignette’s by leaving them in the comment section. The more we write our dreams down and read them on days when it may not necessarily be going so well I believe they will lift up our spirits to keep pressing and don’t give up! Okay, Phamily, see you next Saturday with “Uncreating Contracts.” Have an excellent and breakthrough week!

Namaste’

Remember you are not alone! And sweet sleep and angels keep!

What Are You Accommodating?

familypixHi Phamily! I truly hope all is well in you and with you! Today I’m going to jump right in and ask you a question.

WHAT ARE YOU ACCOMMODATING?

You are probably asking, “What is she talking about? Accommodating what?”

Well, last week I was looking at one of the most inspiring Life Coaches on the planet Iyanla Vanzant’s, “Fix My Life,” television show. She told a client that she was accommodating her dis-ease in which the manifestation was “obesity.” To give you a brief synopsis of the situation the client’s mother died several years ago and as a result parts of her laid down in the coffin with her too. Before that traumatic moment she was the life of the party. Inviting people over for barbecues or celebrations of b’earthday’s was her way of participating with her friend’s in life. She and her mom were extremely close. They were like sisters and the best of friends. You didn’t see one without the other at any time according to friends and family. The absence of her mother created a void in her life that no one or anything could replace. Keep reading what that void created.

emotional eating

One, physically, the manifestation as I mentioned before was “obesity.” She gained a mass of weight [600 lbs.] (EMOTIONAL EATING). Two, she slipped and fell going to the bathroom in her home. The fire department had to come, lift her up, and put her back in the bed. She was so embarrassed that she consciously decided to not leave the house (SHAME, GUILT, HURT, PAIN, DISAPPOINTMENT, ANGER, RAGE, EMBARRASSMENT). This resulted in a breach of not only being with friends but “making” her teenage child become her caretaker. She washed her mom, cleaned her mother’s personal needs in the bed (she couldn’t get up anymore to go to the bathroom), and brought her foods that were not healthy. Watching her mother’s decline physically, mentally, and emotionally seized this young lady’s teenage years, reversed the view of the roles in their relationship,  and abandonment of a mother in her life (ABANDONMENT OF SELF CARE, CHILD, & SELFISH). To accommodate her lifestyle all of her medications, toiletries, sterilized bed pads were placed within arm’s reach. Basically anything that she needed to accommodate her conscious based lifestyle was placed in the boundary of her arm span.

The word “accommodate” reverbrated over and over inside my stomach. I felt the ping or the energy of that word move in me and didn’t stop until it reached cellular level. I asked myself several questions:

questionicon

  1. What familiar generational, cultural, or unserving religious belief system was I accommodating inside my temple, my soul, my mind?
  2. What emotional habit was I consciously or subconsciously making that was keeping me in an emotional, physical, mental, or economic rut?

Let’s go deeper shall we.

I even had to look at the time of the year I was making a major change in my life.

  1. Is it the same time of year every year and why the same time?
  2. What is significant about that time of the year?
  3. If I make this same goal at the same time of the year why am I sabotaging this goal?
  4. What am I afraid of? Why do I believe I’m not worthy of fulfilling my goal?
  5. What is on the other side of completing my goal that I think I can’t handle?

These are the questions that we all have to answer before we conquer our goals. This is a part of “The Four R’s on Your Journey,” specifically Recognize and once truthfully answered Restore will greet you with the emotions, behaviors, ways, and means designed for you to utilize to complete your goals. Spiritually you will be given the innate strength, mental fortitude, and the entity Desire will fill your very soul (mind, emotions, body) to want to complete your goals.

angels

You are not alone family. You have a legion of angels surrounding you to enforce and reinforce your new beliefs. It takes repetition for a belief to become a system and these angels are here to assist you. These angels are visible and invisible. Surround yourself with people that only have your good in mind. They Desire with you to see your goals accomplished. These people will have a “NO” in their mouths when it is needed but it will always be accompanied in the heart of LOVE! You will hear instructions and encouragement spoken to you first by your Creator and then reaffirmed by your earthly angels. By this I mean when I hear through the means of what my soul gravitates to (a book, movie, marquee sign, etc.) a friend in casual conversation will say something to reinforce or offer more of an explanation of what I’ve heard. Your Creator wants you to know beyond a shadow of a doubt that He hears your concerns, you matter, and you are on the right track.

This is my belief and you don’t have to believe in what I’m about to say but I believe in the unseen help and we do entertain angels unaware. I’ve had people to help me and I’ve never seen again. I believe in a force that is unearthly strong and they are working on your behalf when your strength wanes. I believe that any horrendous situation you’ve encountered could have been worse than that just because those angels held back what really wanted to kill you emotionally, mentally, socially, spiritually, and physically. If you believe this then you have to ask yourself, “Who am I really to the Creator and what am I to do in the Earth that Evil wants to take me out?”

This question as you progress on your journey will be answered along the way. You will see yourself differently as the twin entities Recognize and Restore usher you into your new creation of authenticity as the sleeping giant in you is awakened and revealed.

Keep seeking, believing, and taking the necessary risk to reveal more of your emotional, physical, mental, social, spiritual, and economical authentic self.

YOU ARE WORTH IT!

Namaste’,

Lana

I’ve posted the 2nd part of the “Remember My Story,” video! Hear how she accommodated the ‘Rejection,’ and ‘Abandonment,’ of her parental mother and little brother. And again, get out the tissue but really listen with the entity ‘Pay Attention’ to see the patterns of her emotions and behavior when trigger words or uncontrolled situations pushed her buttons. See if you can relate to her story. I know I did. 

Until next time know that you are not alone, sweet sleep, angels keep!

NEED A BOOK CLUB SPEAKER, KEYNOTE SPEAKER, OR WORKSHOP LEADER

I’M AVAILABLE!

You can purchase my memoir, “DIRTY BREATH: TRAPPED BY REJECTION,” at https://www.createspace.com/5102704 and at Amazon under the title. I would love to speak at your next book club meeting (Atlanta metropolitan area), or have a virtual book club meeting through social media. I am also available to speak at your church, organization, or conference.

Contact me at: authorlmhooks@gmail.com Yay!

Lastly, please share this blog with other people you know that can benefit from it. I want our community of people to know we were/are not alone and there is help for the adult child to be emotionally healed. You just have to want to do what it takes and that my friend is a road uniquely designed for your transformation!

“What emotional legacy do you want to leave your child? Mine was Rejection. What’s yours?”lana_web_book_cover

 

Your Story – Stumbling Block to Building Block

heartyfruitHey Phamily! I truly hope all is well in your world and your journey has been productive. Since we’ve last talked I’ve been receiving some wonderful comments from people who have enjoyed reading my thoughts and journey and I just want to take the time to say THANK YOU!!! I really don’t take for granted when you leave a comment and say words of encouragement and kindness to let me know that my journey and what I’ve learned and still learning is helping you! That is a blessing to my soul. Again, THANK YOU!  Keep commenting and I’ll keep responding.

Well, these last couple of weeks so much has been happening in my world that I want to share just a bit with you. And by the way this is a part of RECOGNIZE AND REMOVE, the number’s two and three of The Four R’s on Your Journey. Yes, we are still here because these twins work together to align whatever part of your  life that is being recognized, removed and in the process of being healed to restore you authentically in those areas! I must admit I’ve been having a heaven/hell (just depends on what the issue is) of a time in revisiting areas of my life that I thought were complete, finished, dismissed, GONE! But…there is always a but. I found out that there is some residue that needed to be cauterized. YES, cauterized. Remember, I shared with you in my blog “Words Followed By Signs” that I didn’t like confrontation, and I had to confront the motherlode of all bully’s head on. Well, since then I’ve been confronting other people as well, not as intense as the first one, but nevertheless, it is becoming easier to do so. The fretful words are coming out of my mouth but with the motive and intent of my heart to heal both parties involved. A double edged sword (words) is used to cut both ways. One side is to destroy that which wants to kill you (not the person just their negative energy) and the other side is to heal that inside you that no longer serves you. In essence, I voice my concerns to the person and inwardly (in my soul) fear, rejection is being replaced with courage, power, love, and a sound mind. I no longer want a “soul” connection with the other person’s pain. I want my wound to be cauterized so their wound will no longer connect with what was once in me as well. Let your wounds be cauterized. It’s been amazing to see this process but I must admit it can be agonizing at times.

cauterize

meditatingWhat helps is prayer, meditation, and mantras. I speak in the affirmative. I say, “I choose not to catch anyone’s negative  energy this day,” or, “I am worthy!” To say these mantra’s and scriptures in the ‘Now’, tells your subconscious mind that what you are saying is active at that very moment. You are creating your experience in the present moment. Place your scriptures or mantras where you will see them daily. I see mine every morning  on my vision wall in front of my bed when I wake up. Your scriptures and mantras will build a fortress around your  mind, body, and emotions. The more you say them you are reinforcing them, empowering them, to protect you from other people who may not be aware they are carrying negative energy. But you are protecting yourself with an armor that helps you to stand against verbal blows and possibly removing you from physical harm. Words have energy by their definition and carry the intent or motive of the human thereby releasing them through their breath. Speak your positive words to keep you strengthened, your vibration high, and fortified in your soul. Self-love is priceless phamily.

prayer

My prayers are sometimes two words. THANK YOU! Prayer is a conversation with your Divine and Infinite Intelligence. Actually I find myself praying arbitrarily throughout my day. It’s just a conversation in either me expressing gratitude, worship, asking for protection, or help with something that concerns me or someone else. Some people do have set times and that is fine, others do it throughout their day, or, a mixture of both. It’s whatever you gravitate to. Don’t make it rigid. Be flexible and loving in prayer with your Divine.

buildingblocksI say all of this to really make one point. Your story can either be your stumbling block or building block. When a child plays with blocks they either stack them up or beside each other. They will fall and the child may cry but will eventually pick them back up to start building again. Our stories are similar to those blocks. Think about how your life has gone from one block to the next and just when you think you’ve completed an area in your life and it’s dealt with, the blocks fall. At that moment you want to chuck it and just give up but something, and I like to think, the entity Hope comes in and gently nudges you and says, “No, build again but do it differently this time.” You see some blocks you may not need anymore to complete an area of your life. You had to many blocks the first time but this time you may only need just a few. Don’t allow a few times in an area of your life that the blocks have fallen stop you from trying again. You really are so close to a wound being healed fully, yes, cauterized and your authenticity restored.  Seriously, you are very close…I believe with you!

blocksfalling

And now I invite you to watch a story titled, ReMoved! Get the tissue out but please sit with the entity Pay Attention to her story. Look and listen to the building blocks of her life. Until next time you’re in my thoughts and prayers!

ASSIGNMENT: Fortify your soul with positive scriptures, mantras, and prayers. The more you say them watch when someone says something negative how it bounces off of you. The entity PAY ATTENTION will alert you to how you don’t feel as if someone has kicked you in the stomach. Let me know if this helps you!

Travel safely, sweet sleep, angels keep, and know that you are not alone!

NAMASTE

NEXT TIME: ANGELS

NEED A BOOK CLUB SPEAKER, KEYNOTE SPEAKER, OR WORKSHOP LEADER

I’M AVAILABLE!

You can purchase my memoir, “DIRTY BREATH: TRAPPED BY REJECTION,” at https://www.createspace.com/5102704 and at Amazon under the title. I would love to speak at your next book club meeting (Atlanta metropolitan area), or have a virtual book club meeting through social media. I am also available to speak at your church, organization, or conference.

Contact me at: authorlmhooks@gmail.com Yay!

Lastly, please share this blog with other people you know that can benefit from it. I want our community of people to know we were/are not alone and there is help for the adult child to be emotionally healed. You just have to want to do what it takes and that my friend is a road uniquely designed for your transformation!

“What emotional legacy do you want to leave your child? Mine was Rejection. What’s yours?”

 

Your Story – Stumbling Block to Building Block

heartyfruitHey Phamily! I truly hope all is well in your world and your journey has been productive. Since we’ve last talked I’ve been receiving some wonderful comments from people who have enjoyed reading my thoughts and journey and I just want to take the time to say THANK YOU!!! I really don’t take for granted when you leave a comment and say words of encouragement and kindness to let me know that my journey and what I’ve learned and still learning is helping you! That is a blessing to my soul. Again, THANK YOU!  Keep commenting and I’ll keep responding.

Well, these last couple of weeks so much has been happening in my world that I want to share just a bit with you. And by the way this is a part of RECOGNIZE AND REMOVE, the number’s two and three of The Four R’s on Your Journey. Yes, we are still here because these twins work together to align whatever part of your  life that is being recognized, removed and in the process of being healed to restore you authentically in those areas! I must admit I’ve been having a heaven/hell (just depends on what the issue is) of a time in revisiting areas of my life that I thought were complete, finished, dismissed, GONE! But…there is always a but. I found out that there is some residue that needed to be cauterized. YES, cauterized. Remember, I shared with you in my blog “Words Followed By Signs” that I didn’t like confrontation, and I had to confront the motherlode of all bully’s head on. Well, since then I’ve been confronting other people as well, not as intense as the first one, but nevertheless, it is becoming easier to do so. The fretful words are coming out of my mouth but with the motive and intent of my heart to heal both parties involved. A double edged sword (words) is used to cut both ways. One side is to destroy that which wants to kill you (not the person just their negative energy) and the other side is to heal that inside you that no longer serves you. In essence, I voice my concerns to the person and inwardly (in my soul) fear, rejection is being replaced with courage, power, love, and a sound mind. I no longer want a “soul” connection with the other person’s pain. I want my wound to be cauterized so their wound will no longer connect with what was once in me as well. Let your wounds be cauterized. It’s been amazing to see this process but I must admit it can be agonizing at times.

cauterize

meditatingWhat helps is prayer, meditation, and mantras. I speak in the affirmative. I say, “I choose not to catch anyone’s negative  energy this day,” or, “I am worthy!” To say these mantra’s and scriptures in the ‘Now’, tells your subconscious mind that what you are saying is active at that very moment. You are creating your experience in the present moment. Place your scriptures or mantras where you will see them daily. I see mine every morning  on my vision wall in front of my bed when I wake up. Your scriptures and mantras will build a fortress around your  mind, body, and emotions. The more you say them you are reinforcing them, empowering them, to protect you from other people who may not be aware they are carrying negative energy. But you are protecting yourself with an armor that helps you to stand against verbal blows and possibly removing you from physical harm. Words have energy by their definition and carry the intent or motive of the human thereby releasing them through their breath. Speak your positive words to keep you strengthened, your vibration high, and fortified in your soul. Self-love is priceless phamily.

prayer

My prayers are sometimes two words. THANK YOU! Prayer is a conversation with your Divine and Infinite Intelligence. Actually I find myself praying arbitrarily throughout my day. It’s just a conversation in either me expressing gratitude, worship, asking for protection, or help with something that concerns me or someone else. Some people do have set times and that is fine, others do it throughout their day, or, a mixture of both. It’s whatever you gravitate to. Don’t make it rigid. Be flexible and loving in prayer with your Divine.

buildingblocksI say all of this to really make one point. Your story can either be your stumbling block or building block. When a child plays with blocks they either stack them up or beside each other. They will fall and the child may cry but will eventually pick them back up to start building again. Our stories are similar to those blocks. Think about how your life has gone from one block to the next and just when you think you’ve completed an area in your life and it’s dealt with, the blocks fall. At that moment you want to chuck it and just give up but something, and I like to think, the entity Hope comes in and gently nudges you and says, “No, build again but do it differently this time.” You see some blocks you may not need anymore to complete an area of your life. You had to many blocks the first time but this time you may only need just a few. Don’t allow a few times in an area of your life that the blocks have fallen stop you from trying again. You really are so close to a wound being healed fully, yes, cauterized and your authenticity restored.  Seriously, you are very close…I believe with you!

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And now I invite you to watch a story titled, ReMoved! Get the tissue out but please sit with the entity Pay Attention to her story. Look and listen to the building blocks of her life. Until next time you’re in my thoughts and prayers!

ASSIGNMENT: Fortify your soul with positive scriptures, mantras, and prayers. The more you say them watch when someone says something negative how it bounces off of you. The entity PAY ATTENTION will alert you to how you don’t feel as if someone has kicked you in the stomach. Let me know if this helps you!

Travel safely, sweet sleep, angels keep, and know that you are not alone!

NAMASTE

NEXT TIME: ANGELS

NEED A BOOK CLUB SPEAKER, KEYNOTE SPEAKER, OR WORKSHOP LEADER

I’M AVAILABLE!

You can purchase my memoir, “DIRTY BREATH: TRAPPED BY REJECTION,” at https://www.createspace.com/5102704 and at Amazon under the title. I would love to speak at your next book club meeting (Atlanta metropolitan area), or have a virtual book club meeting through social media. I am also available to speak at your church, organization, or conference.

Contact me at: authorlmhooks@gmail.com Yay!

Lastly, please share this blog with other people you know that can benefit from it. I want our community of people to know we were/are not alone and there is help for the adult child to be emotionally healed. You just have to want to do what it takes and that my friend is a road uniquely designed for your transformation!

“What emotional legacy do you want to leave your child? Mine was Rejection. What’s yours?”

 

How Do We Stop…

familylineage2Hey Phamily! I truly hope all is well with you and your journey in restoring your authentic self. It’s not just a destination but it’s the journey that reveals those parts of your emotional, mental, social, vocal, physical, and spiritual self that have been scattered to the nether parts of your soul. And believe me it is possible to be restored your authenticity in the aforementioned areas. Don’t worry about the time or the how because if you passionately, strongly and any other adjective that you use Desire to be Restored it will happen. I didn’t think it was possible because of my age but that excuse had to be thrown out asap. Why? Because your Desire, magnified to the nth degree, will far outweigh the number of your years on earth and the Divine will restore those lost years with what you missed plus more as a gift to you.

I see you giving me the side-eye…lol!  side eye

That’s okay. I gave the side-eye to the person that told me this too, especially when they were younger than me. But it’s true, I promise you it is. Your childhood adversity can be laid to rest. You just have to Desire it strongly enough and Believe that the Divine can do it. What helps is that you change your Perception of your life’s course. This will in turn change your Trajectory of your path to Restoration. And by the way this is still a part of “The Four R’s on Your Journey,” Recognize. How have you viewed your life’s course up until this point? I know I viewed mine from the entity of Rejection’s perception. From my career choices, to friendships, to financial decisions, and social gatherings, I walked in knowing that I wouldn’t qualify for the higher paying positions, or, I feared in managing my monies. In friendships I knew they would eventually go sour and I would be the dysfunctional cause, and no man that I really liked would like me back. I think you get the picture. Rejection was my perception and my trajectory lined up with what I believed due to how it had been from a little girl. The pattern, I thought, was set and my life spelled out but something happened.

I began to meet people, read books, listen to songs, hear life coaches (remember these are the ways in which my soul authentically gravitates toward) speak another language on positive self-esteem, critical self-talk, anger, verbal abuse, emotional abuse, etc., and you know what I listened. The more they talked the more I listened and desired to be restored. Being healed far outweighed my pain and I wanted to do whatever it took to think with my thoughts, feel with my feelings, and speak unashamedly without seeing a hand hit me in my mouth in my mind’s eye.

prayingwoman1I prayed to God everyday and moment to help me be healed and more importantly open my eyes to see how He wanted me to assist. You know what I kept hearing? Believe. At first it pissed me off because I was like, is that all? It’s got to be more than that. But each time I asked the question my answer was the same. So, I asked Him to help me. I asked Him to open my eyes to see what He saw in me when He created me. I asked Him to make me Aware of my feelings, voice, and thoughts. I wanted to know me inside out. I asked for the entity of Paying Attention so I would know and could write down my thoughts, and know what my feelings felt like and I could hear how my voice really sounded in my ears. I was subconsciously waking up daily and quickly I might add to see this person that I thought I lost at the age of ten. And quite frankly I’m still getting to know me. It comes in stages. There were parts of me that were deeply imbedded in my soul that I didn’t want God to touch. The pain was to great and I wanted to hang on to my anger. I felt that I was justified in my anger and why not? They did it to me. You know who your they are. But it got to a point where I Recognized and was Aware that carrying those they’s were emotionally, mentally, spiritually, and physically weighing me down and affecting my health. My back hurt more than ever and I was being Tormented by past scenes, situations, and words almost minutely. I cried out to God to remove them from me. I believed He could remove them but I did have a part to play, and phamily, this is not easy but it is necessary. forgive3

Forgiveness as I’d learned was not the definition I grew into. It doesn’t mean you forget what happened to you but it does mean that the anger, rage, murder, blame, hurt, pain, unforgiveness, hate, of your abusers is seen from only, and I do mean only a Divine’s perspective and the intensity of your emotions in that traumatic moment is gone. Now, if there is another way then by all means let me know, but this the way I learned to forgive. The Divine, utilizing what I normally gravitated to books (fiction and non-fiction), positive speakers, dreams, visions, the supernatural if you will, showed me why my abusers behaved the way they did. He did not justify their actions toward me but He explained their behavior to me.

He explained it to me in several ways. The first way was He showed me in conversations I had with someone close to them who knew them as a child. They were eye witnesses to the ill actions that were heaped upon them by a parent or someone they knew in authority. Ten times out of ten your abuser was abused. But I must admit I asked the Divine, “If they were treated the same way then why treat me the exact same way?” The next way was the clincher. I was shown how I exhibited the same behavior only in a different mode. Let me explain. Pride. Yeah, let me talk about the big dogg I’ve had to wrestle with. You would think after all I’d been through that the entity Pride would be the last challenge I’d have but it was the first one and a big one. I was prideful in sneaky ways like if someone didn’t know something and I did I inwardly viewed them as dumb, or I know more than them. I’m going to shame the devil today by being transparent. My God knows all about it because I stand before Him naked and unashamed so…I will leave that there…lol!  Also, I thought that I knew the best way to manage your life when my life was in shambles…but I could tell you what YOU needed to do. If that is not the pot calling the kettle black I don’t know what is…LOL! Yes, phamily the entity Pride is a monster and I rush to my God telling Him when it rears its head. So when I saw me as my abuser’s it was an humbling experience and forgiveness was my key to exit and leave that place of Righteous Anger of what they did to me. I too was an abuser and a Religious Bully at that. My memoir explains more about my religious upbringing. Now I don’t know if my abuser’s wanted to know why they behaved in such a manner or even realized that their behavior was abusive but I do know that God is an equal opportunity employer. I can’t answer for them but…

I forgave. Soul freed. Intense emotions from that abusive moment are gone. Forgiveness attained. Done. forgive4

When you see yourself as the abuser it puts a different spin on Forgiveness. Now I can talk about horrid past scenes without my emotions being involved. Or, as the young adults say, “I’m not caught up in my feelings.” I can see the situation from a Perception that is whole and healed and my Trajectory is changed because I’m Aware of my words, thoughts, and feelings and also how Pride can enter. Also, I do pray as led for those who abused me. Knowing what I know about them it is easier for me to assess their emotional terrain when a certain behavior comes on the scene. I do know how to protect myself as well. Just because I forgave them doesn’t mean I put myself in harm’s way. Wisdom phamily, Wisdom. 😉 And you do know that what you wrestle with will come back and try you again. It wants to see if the door is really closed and Forgivess is on guard.

Well, I have a TedTalks I want you to listen to. It’s located on the right side of your screen where normally I’d put a music video. But today I invite you to listen to Benjamin Perks and his talk on “How Do We Stop Childhood Adversity from Becoming a Life Sentence,” TEDxPodgorica. It is worth fifteen minutes to really listen to and view his film.

I promise you Forgiveness is just waiting on you to acknowledge how heavy your soul is carrying all those people, their words, behaviors, and abusive acts toward you around. Your mind, body, and emotions will thank you. Oh, one last thing. Co-workers, peers, and family are noticing how much weight I’ve lost. And I tell them, “Thank you. I’m getting those other people off and outta me.”

Till we meet again travel safely, have a sweet sleep and angels keep, and know that you are not alone.

Namaste’

NEED A BOOK CLUB SPEAKER, KEYNOTE SPEAKER, OR WORKSHOP LEADER

I’M AVAILABLE!

You can purchase my memoir, “DIRTY BREATH: TRAPPED BY REJECTION,” athttps://www.createspace.com/5102704 and at Amazon under the title. I would love to speak at your next book club meeting (Atlanta metropolitan area), or have a virtual book club meeting through social media. I am also available to speak at your church, organization, or conference.

Contact me at: authorlmhooks@gmail.com Yay!

Lastly, please share this blog with other people you know that can benefit from it. I want our community of people to know we were/are not alone and there is help for the adult child to be emotionally healed. You just have to want to do what it takes and that my friend is a road uniquely designed for your transformation!

“What emotional legacy do you want to leave your child? Mine was Rejection. What’s yours?” 

familylineage1familylineage

THANK YOU

Your 6 Traveling Companions

Your 6 Traveling Companions

 

stock-photo-28766010-mental-health-in-word-tag-cloud

Anger… Fear… Courage… Honesty… Transparency… & Forgiveness

These six entities, as I refer to them, will be your life long companions on your journey to emotional authenticity. In any abusive memory you are re-membering, their function and task is interchangeable in availing in your emotional liberation. Other entities waiting in their quiver, no lesser, will ecstatically come forth to replace the masks (behaviors) you were made to wear to survive the emotional abuse.

cryingsinging Gently, yet trepidatiously, you and these six entities will have a love/hate relationship as they unravel, reveal, and separate the authentic parts of your soul (mind, body, emotions) from your abuser’s reality that was forced upon you. True, it was unfair, hurtful, abominable, and all the other adjectives you can find of what they did to you.  I wholeheartedly agree with you!!! They were dead wrong! But at some point you must make a decision that knowing your authentic behavior, living your reality, and not your abuser’s is worth more than blaming, unforgiveness, and being a part of the living dead. Zombies are so overrated :-(.

Always you will need Courage when you take the plunge to understand why those closest to you abused you. The more you analyze their behavior, and sad to say, the more you will see where their traits have infiltrated your psyche in how you operate and behave in treating those in your circle as well.  Truth will pinch and some days kick you square in the gut. It gets bloody in the fight to let go of the hurt, the abuser, and the past. But if you are Honest with yourself, and look at how your abuser’s behavior is a part of your present reality, and accept the TruthTransparency will remove Blame and usher in Compassion.  And not soon afterwards, and when you request her, Forgiveness strolls in clearing your soul of all anger, hurts, haunts, and blame.

wrestlingIn this blog/vlog, if you are ready for the WWF (World Wide Fight) of your soul, then this is for you. I intimately know the wrestle for my path but everyone’s is different. I’m just here to guide you and be an ear to listen.  I can’t promise that it will be speedy, pretty, or a clean fight.  Old habits and beliefs die hard but if you are willing to go the tow then I’m there with you when I need to be. And remember go easy on yourself. The goal is self-love in all places of you who presently are and are be-coming.

Oh, don’t think I’m “Miss Got-It-All-Together,” no, I’m still learning about who I am, but I am well-equipped to get you in the fight, as I am continuing on my path.  The myth, that has spread this as truth, is that we who guide have it all together, and that is just not true.  Daily, if life coaches and others in the field, who are helping people transform belief systems into more excellent ways, are integral beings, they will admit we all are walking a path to wholeness.  And that can only be defined by you and your Creator.

I’m just another vessel that has been given the green light by the Divine and am so honored to take you back to your “playground” as I call it. Your “no limits,” “safe place,” or your “you can do anything and be anything place.”

junglegym

If you’re ready to go back to re-member, recognize your abuser’s behavior from your authentic behavior, remove those false behaviors (mask), and restore your soul then by all means sign up to your right my left. And truly none of your information will be given or sold to a third-party. Discretion, confidentiality, and privacy are of the utmost importance.

January 4th, LET’S GET READY TO RUMBLE! I will post a new blog and every other Saturday I will do a vlog answering your questions. Once a month we will have a Google Hangout introducing you to other fellow guides that will assist you on your emotional authenticity journey as well!!! And again, thank you for signing up! Don’t forget to send me your questions and truly have a peaceful holiday and a transformational New Year!

Oh, I almost forgot the good stuff! I will have a FREEBIE for you on that day as well!

TIP: You’ll need the book to understand the FREEBIElana_web_book_cover

Namaste