Mini or Me?

Mini or Me?

MiniorMe-

I’m sure you’ve seen the Austin Power movies with Dr. Evil and his sidekick Mini-Me who mimics him. Watching a marathon of these movies, I can’t remember which one, Dr. Evil’s biological son returns home and Mini-Me gets jealous. In his mind, he’s been the faithful son for a long time and now he’s being replaced. He desperately tries to regain his position with Dr. Evil but he rejects Mini-Me’s attempts at mimicking him. What once made Dr. Evil so happy is now a turn off to him since his biological son has returned.

fatherdaughterskyI thought of how children try their hardest to impress their parents especially first born children. Parenting does not come with a rule book, or a set of instructions to teach you how to raise a child. So what do most parents do? They raise their child like how they were raised. Teaching them the same way as they were taught but not giving a thought at times that not everything they learned was necessarily all good. Parents pass down character traits, beliefs, mannerisms, opinions, ideologies, likes, dislikes, and even colloquial terms that first born children pick up quickly.

motherdaughtercookingMy last blog talked about uncreating verbal contracts that we make on a daily basis consciously or subconsciously with words. Before I go any further let me be very clear again not everything taught by parents were in error or removed you away from your authentic self. For instance, my mother’s love of reading, writing, and the English language is my love too. That’s a good thing. But her fear of people and evading conflict was not a good thing and I picked that up as well. You see where I’m going with this. Her books became her escapism to not face harsh realities. And as much as I saw that and disliked it I too did the same thing. It’s not easy tearing away the parts of you that were consummated from a parent. Your emotions are torn in half because you are divorcing yourself from their wounded soul to reclaim your true identity, emotions, thoughts, and voice. It feels like a betrayal. You’ve been a mini-me image living in their world for so long that now that you want to reclaim your authentic self but it feels like abandonment. And to be honest with you, you are abandoning certain traits that were never you in the first place. It’s okay.

motherdaughtersittingThis is an identity contract that you must uncreate. Children no matter the birth order are born with their own unique personality. It’s not fair to their psyche or the Creator to repress their thoughts, emotions, and voice. Yes, they will have features, and partial mannerisms but they will have an opinion and a voice. Let them. Actually, Dr. Evil did Mini-Me a huge favor by rejecting him. I know it didn’t feel right at the moment. Dr. Evil, without thought, sliced Mini-Me away from him but in the end, Mini-Me discovered he was his own person and didn’t need Dr. Evil.

As harsh at it may be seizing your soul back from another soul is the best thing you can do for yourself. Discovering your thoughts, beliefs, mannerism, and voice is an exciting adventure that is priceless. Think about it two souls housed in one soul are multiple souls or personalities vying for top position. Eventually, one will reign supreme and you are forced to make the decision as to which one it will be.

We’re moving into February but by year’s end don’t you want to know the person in the mirror staring back? Take some time before the next blog and write down:

  • Several things that you learned from a parent or one in authority over you as a child that you no longer serves you.
  • Uncreate the contract with that character trait, word, belief, mannerism, opinion, ideology, and replace it with what YOU want.
  • Go back to the last blog and repeat the words to uncreate the contract with what you’ve written above or write your own. Empower yourself utilizing your own words.
  • Start your discovery journal of what you really think, believe, and say it aloud to hear your voice. It’s something about hearing the sound of your voice in your ears that makes this exercise real in reclaiming your soul.

God made you in His image. If you look around not one person looks like the other except identical twins and even they have differences. It’s time for your image to be known in the earth, your thoughts to be written, and voiced in the earth. It’s time for you to be present and accounted for, not mini-me, just me.

 I Am

Until next time remember that you are not alone and “Sweet sleep and angels keep!”

Want to know the 6 elements all children and adults needs then click the image and purchase: lana_web_book_cover

THANK YOU!

Listen to one of my favorite spoken word artists: Janette…ikz “I AM”

All images other than specified are: Getty Images (Royalty-Free)

My Halloween Story

upside down

For the last fifteen years my life has been turned upside down financially, spiritually, socially, physically, combined with the transitioning of family members. I’ve cried, screamed, distanced myself, smiled, attached, forgave, and acquired new belief systems, while old ones weren’t going without a fight. To be more specific, financially, I have been in a place of learning that money is a tool to be utilized to give, build up, be a blessing, to restore dreams and prolong life. I’ve had the entity called Pride knocked outta of me to ask for help, learned how to separate my wants from my needs, and God can do more with less. But the greatest lesson was to learn that God is the supplier of all my needs, wants and desires. Places of employment are the means of earning a paycheck, meeting new people, and learning new skills but again it is not my supplier. Even though I’ve learned this lesson the Universe never stopped downloading dreams and goals that I strongly wanted to perform in the earth. A major part of my personality is that I’m goal oriented. I eagerly worked on those dreams and goals which started off wonderfully but ended up either fizzling out or floating on a buoy.

 I’ve lived a certain way and with that comes a mindset due to circumstances of “well, I guess it’s going to be this way.”  The promises made from the Universe still remained dreams and not manifestations. And it didn’t matter how many people known and unknown were sent my way to keep the dreams alive the disappointments of them not coming into fruition produced a hope deferred. Whether I consciously said it aloud or as a subconscious decision it was made nonetheless.

AB11876This year came in with a different aura. The entity “Hope” was spreading her message all through the land from secular to sacred and both were speaking the same language. I was listening. I heard her cry in the streets and opened my window to let her voice ring in my house. I was happy, excited, and elated until I saw in the third quarter that those promises, dreams, and goals made to me were popping out of my journals, in dreams, and people’s voice to make way for them to manifest. I really believed I was ready! Even though I had been waiting for a very long time I just knew I was ready but my past was right there too. It brought along with it my disappointments, mistrust, deferred hope, rejected attempts, and used to “the way” I had been living which was barely enough to make it by the skin of my teeth. A few insecurities, bad judgements, and misperceptions were thrown in the mix too from having passed this way before in religious settings where I experienced “religious abuse.” To put it succinctly I was scared shitless. Fear ten Hope three but Hope had a plan in the hole.

heart broken womanHope and I have been riding together for a long time. We were down like ‘four flat tires and a spare,’ but I was scared and my heart remembered too much. But she was not giving up that easy. This Halloween was different for me. I don’t celebrate it but damn if the witches, ghouls, ghost, and nightmares didn’t join my past to scare me from making a choice. I woke up from a dream that was not pretty but I knew it was from God. I researched the places, colors, light, dark, objects, etc., and I kinda’ knew what it was speaking but I asked God to reveal what He was really saying to me. I sat my tablet down.

I am taking a webinar course on Influence Training and it is spiritual but not religious. It was a panel of people praying for men and women fifty and over to go the length and “do” their dreams. I was watching the chat bar line being filled with request for prayer for sicknesses, finances, etc. I added my request to the plethora of wants/needs to the chat line.

Transparency: I asked prayer for the entity of ‘Rejection’ and ‘Inferiority’ to be removed.

amazed womanThe chat bar was moving like lightning and even though it was at least four people on the panel watching it and praying for various people I ‘hoped’ someone would see my request. Certain words were being spoken to various people and I was sincerely happy for them to be receiving words of encouragement and kindness. And yes, some of those words rang for me as well and I received them, but it was not until one man who I thought left the webinar came back onto the panel. He said (not verbatim but close to it), “there are people on here who have lived a certain lifestyle for a very long time and are afraid that their promises won’t happen. You’ve been rejected by people and attempts to do better but you decided whether you knew it or not that life wasn’t going to get any better than this.” My mouth hit the floor. He also said, “In a way you’ve gotten use to lack and not having, thinking that well, it’s probably going to be this way, but God says emphatically, No! The promises I’ve made to you are coming to pass. Trust me. Believe one more time and watch me make them come to pass.” As I sat on my wooden bench in front of my laptop I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. God not only answered my request but the dream He gave me that early morning was explained in the word He gave the guy. In that instance I chose to believe Him one more time. It reminded me of a moment I had on New Year’s Eve back in nineteen ninety-four when I made a lifestyle change. The heaviness and dread lifted and I know this is my time. I made a conscious decision to leave my past, beliefs, and the feelings of that era behind. Now I’m not naïve to know that I will have to work my dreams out but I’m collaborating with some wonderful people who mean business. They desire to leave a legacy for our children and another kingdom built on and in Love.

Yeah, my Halloween was spooky but Hope, God, and my conscious decision scared the boogeymen away. And on top of that I had an extra hour to sleep and be restored down to the cellular level. November 1st came in with a refreshing.

If I’m speaking to anyone who has been abused religiously or even in relationships with people of authority and the entities ‘Fear, Rejection, Abandonment, and Verbal Abuse’ are trying to keep you in your past – RUN!  I know the emotions from yesteryear will try and convince you that it won’t be any better but it will be better this time. No, I didn’t say it will be rainbows and lollipops but trust the God of your creation to make it better. Yeah, I know, I trusted Him lotsa times too and nothing came of it but today you know what I discovered? I wasn’t ready for those dreams back then. He was just showing them to me because He wanted me to get my feet wet, reveal to me my pattern of leadership, and to know that my original desires to have a business He honored then and honors now. But we can’t do it alone. I know that’s scary, believe me, I know. But He will send people to assist you so trust and listen to your instincts, guts, and that nagging you feel…lol! Ask for Lady Wisdom and she will show up and give you the words to speak and ears to listen. These new people may have some traits of those that abused you before but take a breath, get still, and ask for your angels to surround you along with Peace. These are not those people. It will work out for you. I believe that for you and for me. I’m not suggesting anything to you that I’m not practicing myself. Like I’ve been saying to you in all my post, “You are not alone.” Let’s walk this place called Life together. Your past won’t let go so easy but you have the power of choice to let go of it.

woman with diary

Namaste’

Now listen to the lyrics of one of my favorite songs from the 80s by McFadden & Whitehead “Ain’t No Stoppin’ Us Now.” That’s my theme song as I dance down the Soul Train of Life! Join me Phamily!

Until next time know that you are not alone, sweet sleep, angels keep!

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You can purchase my memoir, “DIRTY BREATH: TRAPPED BY REJECTION,” at https://www.createspace.com/5102704 and at Amazon under the title. I would love to speak at your next book club meeting (Atlanta metropolitan area), or have a virtual book club meeting through social media. I am also available to speak at your church, organization, or conference.

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Lastly, please share this blog with other people you know that can benefit from it. I want our community of people to know we were/are not alone and there is help for the adult child to be emotionally healed. You just have to want to do what it takes and that my friend is a road uniquely designed for your transformation!